I was, as a teen ager and young adult, attracted to men old enough to be my father. Now I am that age (52) myself. If I were to meet Lou Grant now, at the age he first appeared on the “Mary Tyler Moore” show, he would be a younger man (early 40’s). Most of my fantasies have dealt with younger men having sex with older men, with me placing myself in the position of the younger man. In my mind’s eye, I’m still James Dean. However, in reality, I’m more like Robert Bly. How do I wrap my head around this incongruous paradox? How will I adjust to the new reality? I routinely run into younger men who call me “sir”. I guess I’ll have to turn into a “sir”, since I have graduated from being male ingenue.
